A Scream!!!
Written October 30thOK, as if this move was not a pain in the arse as it is, it just keeps getting better! So, you all know this was a last minute thing, and even though we knew it could happen, we were not really ready for it. Well, money wise we are totally unprepared, but hey, not everyone pinches pennies and saves for a rainy day! Well, here we come down to the 7 days prior to leaving the island after clearing housing. Should not be a big deal, but it seems it really is one here in Hawaii. Department of Public Works (DPW) and Army Hawaii Family Housing (AHFH) struck a deal 3 years ago when AHFH took over the housing from DPW. Seems they decided to only offer 3 days of temporary lodging assistance to outbound soldiers, because this way the housing office collects more rent! Well, I didn't like that answer after I had heard near everyone else say 10 days...so I looked it up in the DOD regulations. Sure enough, we are alloted 10 days max, so us asking for 7 really should not be a problem. Yeah, well, thehousing guy denied us so we have to take it to US Army Garrison Command to ask for it to be approved! This is retarded since the regs specifically state 10 days and AHFH is just trying to make a buck! So, that memo has been faxed to him and we will check in tomorrow on that one.So, tonight we go to the Inn to ask about a room. We only need a room for tomorrow and Thursday night because we have plans for Friday and Saturday. So, she tells us $282.70. Now, mind you, this Inn is like a darn Super 8, nothing fancy at all. So, G tells her, OK, TLA will cover that. She tells him, "No, you have to pay it up front and they will reimburse you when you do your paperwork on the other end"! OK, so, we are suppose to pay for our room and board and food and wait for the Army to pay us back? Yeah, right! Beings that will not be until Feb that he can turn in the paperwork! I am just really frustrated. This is about enough. Stay in housing and get screwed out of money until mid-December cause AHFH will hold onto it until then; pay out of pocket and pray they give us money back in Febuary; or just live in the damn car til next Wed!!! I am so beyond pissed at this point. This is sickening the way everyone is out to make a buck off the soldiers...and most let them! Even the military wives board I posted the regs on looked at it and still mentioned just getting 3 days and it was no big deal! It is a big deal people, they are making money off you and you are letting them feed your head with bullcrap and getting away with it! I so wish people would wake up and realize that the civilian people are taking over everything that has to do with our finances and screwing the soldiers and their families, and no one asks questions! Read the regs people! That is what they are there for!!! Then, call them on the discrepencies!! Nothing changes til you confront them!
Posted by Babs at 10:24 PM 0 comments
Labels: Moving with the Military
Leaving the Island
6 November 2007Well, tomorrow is almost here. I ache inside really; dreading G’s farewell lunch today and saying goodbye to D and Paul tonight. I cry just tossing around the idea of leaving here. We may not have the friends nor the luxury of the mainland and the ability to up and go somewhere, but I have peace, happiness, fulfillment here on this island. I will be back….just the thought of coming back makes me ease up a little. I can envision getting off a plane and the drive down H-1 smiling knowing I am “home”. Yeah, I really do feel at home here…this is where I was meant to find myself, and I have. Unless someone can entice me with another island, this is where I want to die…listening to the surf, smelling the clean air, watching the surfers, honu, smelling the plumeria and watching all the colors of the island flowers…all year long!It has been a long week of crap. AHFH is a major money making scheme and the people just let them do it. These wives, husbands, dependants, service members need to stop letting these civilian contracted companies walk all over us. They take our money left and right and make up rules as they go along; but even though people have questions, they never ask them. I am so sick of sitting in silence over the issues that so many of us face and hate yet never talk about in the open. It is sickening to even think about other things that we have yet to encounter that the military is letting people on the outside take from the soldiers and their families. They think just because we are military we have to suck it up and shut our mouths….I am so sick of shutting up. The kids are out of school. Took Katie to say goodbye yesterday and I was in tears. I had to get up and busy myself to not cry and let her see me. Her teacher gave me worksheets on every letter of the alphabet and an entire math workbook so I can continue to work with Katie on the road. I want to be able to have her on track and maybe even show the new school she deserves to be in Kindergarten even if she is 17 days too young! That is such crap in itself. Jordan I am sure is disappointed with his birthday. I feel really bad, but with no place to live and no cash for the extras since we are getting no help with this more, I could not do a party for him. We took him bowling and took Tyrek with us. Ty is a good friend to Jordan, and the really only good one he has had since Sean moved away, so I think it was fitting. Shitty Mom I am though…I didn’t even get him a cake or a card. We did get him some neat drum sticks that you play in the air and connect to his Ipod, though! I think I will ask if maybe everyone can get together in Clatskanie for a small party for him this coming weekend once we get there. Surprise him maybe. G wants to go see everyone, I don’t want to stay, so maybe this can be the happy medium.I think Zach wants to move home sooner than later, but he has not said anything to me. I am afraid to ask him, only because I know that he enjoys this climbing club and he is working on weekends. I think he misses his Mom. If we lived there, he would be happy…and I think he feels that once we move, we will be there a lot, but I really do not have any intention of severely changing my life just because we moved close to “home”. Maybe that idea will change once we get there, but we are not a “working” family like the rest of our family, we are military and have a definite different way of life. I want to remain independent in my ways and with my family life, not try to fit in with them or fit their expectations. Alyssa is on my mind a lot. I keep thinking I will hear the words, “Can I come up with you”. Not going to happen though. She really is doing OK, but just OK. I wish she would decide to go to school and decide on a future instead of worrying about a job and apartment. Jose isn’t even a worry…his parents have him under lock and key until he is done with his schooling or until he decides not to take anymore of the questions and controlling…which either way will be a while. I still wish she would focus more on herself than on them. I have my wonders about other things with Jose….and I still have my wonders of what it is Alyssa really feels or calls “love”. She is still that little girl that needs the undivided attention of the person willing to give it to her. She still has those self-esteem problems that I suppose I put there when she was 3 and was abused, taken into foster care, moved to her grandmothers, then to her dad’s with a step mom that didn’t want her…but it all stemmed from me and my poor choice and my inability to be a Mom at that time. She needs counseling to help her grow. She needs to let out the hatred and fears she has and the anger and resentment she has inside her. Once it comes out, her life will change. I know it will. I have been there for other things, and talking to an outsider who listens and tries to help you, really, really helps to let go and come to terms and deal.Since I am touching on everyone, guess I should mention G…lol. I love him, but there are times I just laugh at him and wonder. I hope this new job will make him a little happier with himself and it proves to be fulfilling and interesting for him. He keeps talking about seeing if he can get attached to group once he graduates, and I hope he can since I know it is something he has wanted for 14 years now. I just hope he actually follows through with his desire and asks and puts his feelers out and does not procrastinate about it like he does with many other aspects of his career. I do not repeatedly ask him if he did this or that or called this person like I use to…I have let it be that if her truly wants it, he will do it…but damn it is so hard to keep my mouth shut and not tell him if he hadn’t procrastinated or if he had done something it may have turned out differently. Other than that, learning some release of stress and anger skills would be a plus…but you can’t teach an old dog new tricks…but I can still try and be encouraging! Try yoga and meditation, damn it!!!So, other than that, life is still what you make it, and mine is just that. Mild chaos, laughter, crying, pent up frustrations, but serene and I could not ask for more nor do I want any less. In exactly 36 hours, I will be on a plane starting another chapter of life in my military spouse experience…sigh…and I am sure that in 3 years, I will be saying the same thing all over again!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Movers are almost done...these guys have been awesome. Katie on the other hand just cost me IDK how much money! One of the cubes in Jordan's room stuck to the floor and when they picked it up, the tile tore and there was a hole about the size of a half dollar. No big deal, we could probably find a tile to replace it with at G's work. Well, little missy here went upstairs and proceeded to tear 4 more tiles up!!! WTH is wrong with this child??? I have never seen a child so distructive! She colored all over her bedroom in crayons, markers, and permanent markers, colored on Jordan's wall in one spot, cut the hair on her little ponies, cut her bedroom curtain 1 days after I put them up, cut her dolls hair, cuts paper into a milion pieces, and we found that yesterday she cut all the fabris that connected the wooden slats to hold the mattress on the top bunk! Yes, we hide, take away, throw away scissors, markers, etc...but she finds them and we can't throw them all away cause some of us still need them....but what is the deal??? UGH
Posted by Babs at 5:23 PM 0 comments
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Stinky Update - FLS in cats
This is so frustrating to say the least. I finally did some looking up online the other night for this issue to get more info and try to figure out how to get her to eat and whatnot. I had to look it up because Friday night, I really thought she was going to die in my lap. I think she had a seizure, and I sat next to her half on me and sobbed. But, luckily, she didn't. What I found, was that it is called FLS and causes are unknown. If caught early, recovery is pretty much guaranteed. 35% will die though if not taken care of. Most are fed via a feeding tube though, and we do not have that. It says you can force feed, which we are doing, but you have to make sure they get enough calories and nutrients. I had to research that info as well. It also states that you may have to force feed for up to 8 weeks if the cat does not show interest in food. So, I feel comfortable with the info I found, more info really than what the vet sent me home with.So, as for her, yesterday she willingly ate canned cat food for me, unlike the night before where we were feeding her through a syringe blended food and formula. She at almost half of a small can, which is good. I could not get her to drink anything though...the day before she actually drank milk, but have not been able to get any liquids into her since then. Today, she has turned her nose up to everything food, eggs, milk, formula, water, and pdeialyte. Good note, she has been walking around and trying to get outside again...she really has not moved in 2 days, so this is a sign she is feeling better. She also managed to walk up the stairs last night or early this morning and she pooped on her way up, which is good cause she hasn't done that in a while that we know of. We know she was urinating though...casue I had to throw out Katie's carpet yesterday because she had found a spot to go and it was awful smelling! I know TMI....lol. We have also noticed, that yes, she gets pissy with us and will not eat. Literally refuses to eat if we make her mad. Because we gave her meds to her the other night, she would not eat. I had to smear it on her paws for her to lick it off before she we eat it willingly from me! So, I do believe she caused this by not eating due to the kittens moving in, which is a feesable reason according to the sites I read.So, here are the stats.....she seems to have more energy today and can walk without the stumbling but still wobbly. Today she is vocal, groaning, meowing, and wanting outside again. She has pooped, but not eaten or drank today. Will be force feeding her before the day is over if she will not eat something willingly. Her jaundice does seem to have lessened some. Please keep praying for her and me! I really need her to get better so that she can move with us.
Posted by Babs at 3:04 PM 0 comments
Labels: FLS, Stinky
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